|
|
If you have ever been through the process of adopting,
you would wonder which is worse pain, giving birth or adopting? Alas I
strongly feel nothing worthwhile is or should be easy, but really
come-on folks!
Yes, there should be proper screening to adopt a child!
BUT you should be able to get to the point where you can be screened!
The government does complain about the number of children in the system
and the children need homes, um yup... so stop promoting that fact and
make a more organized responsive system! Ah my crazy dreams!
So, I thought I would share here the process as I learn
more about it. I have intended to adopt since I was a kid, and the
thought never left me. My husband is also very much for this, so that
makes it that much nicer! We both did not want to look for a newborn, we
would prefer to give a home to a child who would less likely have one (over
4 years of age).
So enjoy the steps, and maybe through our agony I can
help someone else with the process (I hope!). (see
below...)
Terms:
<return to top>
Adoption Sources:
-
Adoption Exchanges:
Organizations that connect potential adoptive parents with
adoption agencies.
-
Private Agencies:
(non & for-profit agencies). Licensed by the state (relies
on fees and donations, not taxes to operate). Some private
agencies place local (or international) infants or
children with assistance of public agencies to place
children in foster care.
-
Public Agencies:
(State & County) aka Department of Social Services, Human
Services, Children & Family Services, etc. Responsible for
placing children in foster (or institutional homes) with
adoptive families.
Adoption Steps:
-
Home Study: (performed
by an adoption agency or licensed social worker). A 3 part
process required before a child can be placed with a family (foster
or adoption). The result will be a written document completed by
a licensed agency (with a summary of the applicant's family life).
The document shows approval of the applicant for adoption (or
foster). Annual updates are required.
-
Written: autobiographies, references,
medical reports, financial statements, child abuse & criminal
clearances (and other written materials).
-
Social Work: series of visits in the
applicants home to discuss a variety of issues from the
applicant's background, motivations to adopt & understanding of
adoption & parenting.
-
Educational: training in adoptive and
parenting issues.
-
Pre-Placement:
after home-study & before placement.
-
Placement: Adoptive
child, moves into adoptive family's home.
-
Post-Placement:
After placement, before finalization. Social worker supervises
the home for 6-12 months during this term to offer support for the
family and the child as well help with other assistance as needed. (a
certain number of visits are required by the court, for the adoption
to become finalized)
-
Disruption:
Before finalization the child leaves the adoptive home. Why?
-
Birth Parents revoke
their consent to the adoption.
-
Adoptive parents return
the child.
-
Agency disrupts adoption,
if adoptive parents do not comply with post placement
requirements or endangering the child in any way.
-
Finalization: The
Finale, when the court makes the adoption legal.
-
Dissolution:
dissolved by the court or adoptive parents. (similar to
disruption).
-
Post Adoption:
period following the legal finalization. an undetermined time
period, where the family works and enjoys becoming a family.
Types of Adoption:
-
Foster Adopt: A
child is placed in a Foster home before the birth parents'
rights have been legally terminated. (child could be returned
to their birth family). A Foster Adopt family will be
considered if the birth parents' parental rights have been
terminated.
-
Independent Adoption:
an adoption arranged through a lawyer or doctor (vs. a
licensed adoption agency). ** not legal in all states, check
with your state social services.
-
Co-operative/Open
Adoption: personal contact information exchanged between
birth parent(s) and adoptive family. An ongoing relationship may
be available to the child with their birth family.
-
Semi-Open Adoption:
personal contact information is not often exchanged.
Communication through a 3rd party (i.e.: adoption agency).
-
Closed Adoption:
no information about the birth or adoptive family is exchanged
or shared. No identifying background information about the child
or birth family is made available to the adoptive family.
Records are sealed after adoption and no available to the child.
-
Identified/Parent
Initiated Adoption: adoptive parents & birth parents know
each other, the process is handled through a licensed agency.
-
Legal Risk Adoption:
Child placed with perspective adoptive family prior to
termination of birth parent's rights. (often infant adoptions
in PA). Birth parents could revoke their consent of the
adoption & child would have to be returned to the birth parents.
(PA: legal risk period is approx 45-100 days from placement).
-
Interstate Compact on
the Placement of Children ICPC: organization in all 50
states that must give approval on any child moving from state to
state (for the purpose of adoption, foster or residential care).
The approval must be by the child's state and the adoptive
state, before the child can cross state lines.
Disorders:
-
Adaptive Delay:
individual with adaptive delay fail to adjust
to their environment within expected time ranges.
-
Adjustment Disorder:
development of emotional or behavioral
symptoms (depression, anxiety, sleeping problems,
inappropriate conduct) in response to an identifiable stress
event that are more intense then one would expect from such a
stressor. These children may experience significant trouble in
school in social situations.
-
Attachment Disorder:
inability to develop significant emotional connections with
other people. (abused/neglected, even when very young, may
experience this disorder). Signs: difficulty maintaining eye
contact, lying, and not responding to affection.
-
Reactive Attachment
Disorder RAD: resulting from early
lack of consistent care, characterized by a child or
infant's inability to make appropriate social contact with
others. Symptoms: lack of eye contact, feeding disturbances,
hypersensitivity to touch & sound, failure to initiate or
respond to social interaction, indiscriminate sociability,
self stimulation & susceptibility to infection.
-
Developmental Delays:
:delayed development (as measured
with other children's development of skills at the same age).
-
Receptive
language skills—the ability
to process and understand others’ spoken or written words.
Relinquishment:
birth parent gives up custodial & legal rights to a child. Legally
binding, permanent.
Revocation of Consent:
birth parent revokes the consent they signed to an adoption & requests
the child be returned.
Termination of Parental Rights:
court hearing, ending the legal parental
rights of the birth parent(s) to a child. This must occur before a child
can be "legally free" for adoption.
-
Voluntary:
birth parents choose (of their own desire) to relinquish
rights to their child.
-
Involuntary:
legal rights terminated by the court with out signed consent of
the birth parents. (abandonment, repeat/server abuse or
neglect of a child).
Special Needs/Waiting Children:
(Both these terms are used for the same situation). Often adopted
through state or county agencies. Children who meet one or more of the
following:
-
Specific physical, medical, mental or emotional
handicap.
-
Child over 5 years of age.
-
Siblings (2 or more children) that must be
placed together.
Group Home: staffed by
social workers & counselors. Children typically over age 5, in need of
emergency temporary shelter or long term living arrangement.
Residential
care/treatment—a structured 24-hour
care facility with staff that provide psychological therapy to help
severely troubled children overcome behavioral problems that adversely
affect family interaction, school achievement, and peer relationships.
Residential treatment tends to be the last resort when a child is in
danger of hurting himself or others
Respite care—child
care and other services designed to give parents temporary relief from
their responsibilities as caregivers
IEP Individualized Education
Plan: plan created by the child's special education teacher, that
outlines specific skills the child needs to develop and learning
activities that will build on the child's strengths.
Great Sites:
<return to top>
-
Terms:
-
Cool Sites:
-
Adoption Sites:
-
Great Resources Sites:
-
Adoption Blog Site:
Adoption
Blog. Awesome resources, info & MORE!!
-
Internet Adoption Resource Site
Adopting.com
(including links for waiting children!)
Q&A for Adoption
Professional:<return to top>
- How long have you been in
operation?
- Where do your operating
funds come from?
- Are you licensed by the
state? (If you’re interviewing a
facilitator, ask them if they
work with reputable agencies.
Get the names of the agencies
and contact them, as well).
- Has there been or is there
presently any litigation pending
against your business?
- How extensive is the
training that your staff members
receive?
- How much experience in
adoption services do you require
of your staff members?
- Can I speak with some of
your former clients?
- How much pre-adoption
counseling is provided for
adoptive parents?
- What kind of post-adoption
counseling is provided for
adoptive parents?
- If no post-adoption
counseling is provided, can you
refer me to other competent
professional services for
post-placement followup?
- What is the nature of the
adoption counseling provided for
prospective birth parents? Does
the counseling give them the
freedom to choose parenting, or
does it steer them toward
adoption?
- What steps do you take to
forge relationships that will be
healthy and natural for both the
adoptive family and the birth
parents 10 years down the road?
- What steps do you take to
make sure that the rights of all
parties are protected?
- What kinds of glitches have
you experienced during your
facilitation of adoptions and
how have you dealt with them?
Our Adopting Process (what
we have learned, and steps we have followed)... this is ongoing,
info will be added as we learn and do more...
<return to top> I will look forward to sharing the addition of
a new daughter(s), son(s) or one of each.. we shall see!!
-
Chad started surfing online, found some adoption
sites. (like the Adoption Exchange).
(July -August 2005)
-
We found a child (age 13) who we inquired
about. After a month we found her case worker left the country,
and she had a new one. So we gave it some time to find out more,
the new case worker said it would take a bit before she would be
available for adoption. (she had been listed on the adoption
exchange at least since February 2005, and it was July!) So
we waited a few more months, inquired again, still told it was
unknown when she would be available (gee what when she
graduates from high school).
-
Adoption Rally: (late October 2005)
-
Chad found a local Adoption Rally. We attended,
seems the main push is for Foster Care, not adoption (yet it
was an Adoption Rally, and they did express the need for
adoptive homes, we have found there is limited resources and
assistance for adoption.).
-
INFO: Starting in 2006, we did find the Home
Studies, will be made consistent so they will easily transfer
from agency to agency. We also found that the adoption industry
(at least locally) has been made privatized (though
apparently since we want to adoption (not foster) we can
do it through the county (the hard part is the lack of
response and assistance through this process).
-
Searching: (early November 2005)
-
With reconfirmation of the unknown status of the
child we were (are) initially interested in, we looked at
some more children. We did find a few others (in the same age
range), and inquired, we are now waiting for the case
workers to call us...
|
